a bit of sadness...

Some disheartening news to report: this morning, around 11:50, our dear office betta fishie, Magnolia (Maggie) departed this world. She struggled and fought death, and in the end, laid to rest on the bottom of her tank. She will be remembered as a spritely creature who always brought smiles to our faces and mirth to our hearts. Thank you, Maggie, for being our fishie friend for almost a year. Committal service will be held in my backyard at home, after she floats to the surface and we can get her out.

New Picture!

I didn't realize that I could put a picture up there on top of the blog page, so when I did, I did. I took it of a corner of my desk. It sort of captures a microcosm within my office - my fish, Magnolia (Maggie for short), the array of colorful pens that I enjoy writing with, my collection of directories and over on the right, my husband and I. If you look just above our picture, you can see part of my Terrible Towel. :)

Isn't it interesting how we let certain people see certain parts of ourselves? Some folks see the 'work' side, some see the 'play' side, some see the serious, others the hilarious. Some see the worst part of us, some see the best. Some of that is what they perceive; some is what we choose to show them.

I wish someone would have helped me to be real as a teenager. I wish someone would have encouraged me to find out who I was, then be that as much as possible. Instead, I learned how to play the church game, the school game and the home game. I had the Christian friends game and the non-Christian friends game. I had different personalities in different situations. That might sound weird, and it was - not easy to keep up with.

The people I admire most in this life are those who are consistently themselves. Even people I can't stand being around - I have to give them credit for being authentically grouchy in every situation. Encourage youth to be kind and pleasant, but also to be honest.

example-

There were several times as a youth when I felt as though I should not take communion because of a dirty/angry heart. But I was afraid of what people would think about me - the misconceptions they would have and spread because I didn't take part in the ritual - so I would always do it anyway.

It never occurred to me that if I didn't take communion, maybe someone would approach me and ask if I needed prayer. Maybe someone would offer to aid in reconciliation in whatever situation it was needed for. The sad thing is, being honest never occurred to me because I couldn't imagine someone responding to it in that way. I had never seen it happen before, so it never crossed my mind.

Are we making a conscious effort in our churches to encourage honesty? To develop deep mentoring and accountability? Are we helping young people to deal honestly with their sins and struggles or do we discourage them when we ourselves are not honest within the Body?

Interesting questions. Think.

Obedience...

When I was little, my dad and I would sometimes go for an adventure. Whether it was a day in some big city or a hike through the woods, oftentimes, Dad would give me a little talk before we set out. He would scrunch down and look at me, and remind me that I was to do as I was told, even if I didn’t understand why. I didn’t even understand why he would tell me that. “Why can’t I know why?” I wondered.

The older I got, the more clearly I saw his reasoning. He was taller, he was stronger, and he was more attuned to what was happening around us. I might be examining jewelry in a storefront display, dreaming about how much I would sparkle, but he might see a big accident about to happen on the street behind us. I may be staring intently at a butterfly or an unusual leaf, but he may be looking at a copperhead further down the path. Because I trusted that he was looking out me, I learned to obey when he gave instruction.

It's pretty much the same way with God – we don’t see the bigger picture. Many times, I’m focused on some issue or some situation that’s happening in my life, and I can’t see past it! When God gives me direction, it’s usually not the answer I’m hoping for. Sometimes it makes no sense at all! But because I’m learning more and more to trust Him and rely on Him, I’m also learning that my obedience to God is a necessary and fruitful part of the process.

When I first went to college, I prayed for an open mind, an open heart and open eyes. I sang that song. You know the one - "Open the eyes of my heart, Lord..." I asked God to use me. Asked Him to teach me. Asked Him to broaden my horizons.

He sent me to Africa. I protested loudly, then I surrendered and walked onto a plane. What an awesome time! So many amazing, unique people in such a beautiful, ancient land! I came back changed - newly aware that there is a world beyond Western PA and even beyond the United States of America. That Christians across the sea have many things to teach us! Obedience.

There were guys at school that I wanted to date. Wanted to be a part of their lives. But I listened to Him and He didn't direct me to any of them for romance. So I learned how to be a good friend to guys. I observed what makes them tick. I watched the mistakes my friends made in relationships, and I tucked all of that knowledge away. I waited. Obedience.

Because we can’t see it all.

Mary couldn't see the empty tomb from the stable in Bethlehem. She just obeyed. God had entrusted her with His most precious gift to the world. Which is amazing! But there were still 3 a.m. feedings and skinned knees and broken dishes and homework. She is remembered across the globe, 2000 years after her life, not because she did anything phenomenal or fantastic, but because she was obedient in the little things. Because she changed diapers and cooled fevers and mended clothes and taught Jesus how to live in 1st century Palestine. She faithfully did the thankless tasks of any mother, even though she couldn't see where her toils would get her. She was obedient out of love.

“If you love me, obey my commands.” Remember that? Jesus said it. It's true. If you love someone, you try to please them. We shouldn't obey God out of fear or guilt or because we hope to be rewarded in return ... we should obey God out of love, because of who He is and what He did/does for us.

"If you love me, feed my sheep." Remember that? Jesus said it. To Peter. Three times He asked him - "Do you love me, Peter?" (kinda like how Peter denied knowing Jesus three times, huh?) Three times, now, Peter replied, "Yes, Lord, I love You!" The answer came. "Then feed my sheep." "Take care of my lambs." "Take care of my sheep." If you love me, then trust me and obey me! Carry on my work! Be faithful, even in the small tasks for which you've been appointed.

So, how are you doing? With obedience. It's tough sometimes. It's tough to have a Master, a Lord. It's tough to focus all your love on a God you can't physically see. But it's worth it. Obedience to God is always worth it. Listen, read, ask, surround & saturate yourself with godly influences. Set yourself up for success!

Trust ... and obey.

Monday, Monday...

...so good to me.

I really like the Mamas & The Papas. a lot.

and I like Easter week, too. it's crazy busy, and it's a lot of time at church, being the church. but that's okay. I figure that Jesus spent a few days being brutalized and trudging through Hell just to set me free, so I can give a few days that are focused on Him. that's pretty much the least I can do.

many thoughts cruising through my brain today, but here's the one that sticks out, so I'll share my musings on that:

the Monday before Easter is believed to have been the day that Jesus overturned the tables of the money-changers in the Temple.

that makes me wonder... how often do we practice thievery in the church? how many times do we take money from people (in good faith) and use it unwisely? all morning, I've heard the phrase "Tithing Sunday" being tossed around. what does the church do with the tithe?

now, I'm not asking 'what account does it go into?' read the question again. what does the church do with the tithe?

I'm not being flippant, I promise. but I do wonder. how much money do we hoard, for 'just in case'? I know of some churches (and parachurch organizations) that just keep opening new CDs and savings accounts. just keep stashing it away and spending just enough money to make it look like something's being done.

do you think that Jesus would come into our churches and overturn our communion tables, sending the offering plates flying? do you think He would accuse us of operating a den of thieves instead of a house of prayer?

maybe. I think many of us will be surprised when we finally end up at the Judgment Seat of Christ. we will be surprised at all of the good things that our actions have spawned, and we will be surprised at all the opportunities and blessings we missed because of our selfishness.

what about you? what are you doing with the blessings you've been given? and I'm not asking how much cash you put in the plate every week - I want to know what you're doing for the Kingdom of God - how are you using the talents and abilities that God has blessed you with?

let's focus (this week, for starters) on the wise stewardship of our gifts. let's practice daily being the church instead of fretting over the color of the carpet in the church building. let's pour ourselves into being the Body of Christ to a world that is hungering for Truth.

let's be who we are called by Jesus to be.


malachi 3:8-12